What is love
Welcome back to the Bodega. Grab a seat, get comfortable, and let’s talk about something we all chase but rarely stop to define.
Lately, I’ve been thinking a lot about direction. We live in a world covered in street signs—metal boards telling us where to turn, when to stop, and how fast to go. We have signs directing us everywhere except back to ourselves.
That thought is the heartbeat of my upcoming gallery exhibition, "Love Signs." It’s a series of handmade paper pieces replicating street signs, but instead of traffic laws, they hold messages of love. Because honestly, why aren't we creating signs to guide us back to loving ourselves, our lives, and each other?
To build up to the show, we’re going to be talking about love every single week. And there’s no better place to start than the heavy hitter: What actually is love?
The Elite Emotion (And the State of Mind)
We use the word "love" so loosely these days. We love a slice of pizza, we love a movie, we love a pair of sneakers. But real love? It’s sacred. It’s an elite emotion.
But it’s also more than a feeling. It’s a state of being. It’s a dimension you step into.
Love is acceptance, companionship, care, and connection. I know I love you if I accept you exactly as you are, and if I care enough to even try.
It’s an exclusive pact. An agreement. An understanding. It can be conditional or unconditional, healthy or toxic. You can love someone and not even like them sometimes. It’s a beautiful, messy paradox.
Fancy Respect
If you strip away the romance and the drama, what is love at its core?
It’s respect and appreciation. Or, as I like to think of it: love is respect with a fondness and fancy. It's fancy respect.
I love myself. I accept, appreciate, care for, and consider myself. And because I do that for me, I am actually capable of doing it for you.
Which brings us to a hard truth...
The Self-Love Illusion
We’ve all heard the cliché: "You can't love someone else until you love yourself." But think about it deeply. It is literally impossible to love someone more than you love yourself. If you claim you do, it usually just means you’ve stopped caring about your own soul.
True, unconditional love doesn't mean boundaryless devotion. In fact, unconditional love requires boundaries.
Someone who truly loves you loves themselves first.
They come with boundaries—an agreement with their own self.
They will uphold those boundaries rather than appease you.
Love isn't for the faint of heart. Love is for the real warriors. It is for the fearless. It takes a massive heart to love in a world that can be so cold.
Flexing the Muscle
Love is a muscle. You aren't just born with it fully developed; you have to exercise it. And the very first place you have to start working it out is in the mirror.
So, I have to ask you:
Are you exercising your love muscle today?
Stay tuned for next week's bulletin, and keep your eyes on the streets for "Love Signs."
